Men Are Jerks: Wha? Wha?

I often wonder.

Wha makes people talk like foreigners when they were only like... err.. 4 months abroad? Not to say they are dating the locals there. I dunno. Whilst some of them do come out sounding alright (still kinda odd), there are many others who are obviously... FAKING it.

Take SALAH B (tm) for example. He has never been overseas (ok, Singapore) and he speaks with a funny accent. It is neither American or England, or Australia for that matter.

I met a guy last night in a seminar. Worked in London, recently relocate (BACK) to Singapore. Funny accent too. I have never lived in London, but his accent is definitely not London accent, unless it's beyond Zone 6. For the record, I stayed in Hendon for 3 days. More often than not, people with funny accent, are strangely arrogant (or downright stupid). In our very brief lunch encounter (less than 1 hour) and in between our seven course lunch, this ex-London-recently-relocated-to-Singapore-self-claimed- high-flying-prick has managed to tell me (or whatever that I have managed to make out of his funny accent):
1. he has a flat in London, which he is renting out now.
2. he bought a flat in Singapore, for SGD800k. Original price paid by the vendor 3 years back was SGD1.2 million.
3. the vendor has some problem and he is telling the vendor off. but he is still buying that flat.
4. he worked in London, and he is fabulous.
5. his mother is from Melaka.
6. his colleague thinks that he will do VERY well in criminal litigation.
7. he is not sure if he will settle well into Singapore. hence he was renting a place when he first "relocate" to Singapore.
8. his current landlord is evicting him from his place.
9. despite what he said in (7), he was educated and brought up in Singapore.
10. his father is also a lawyer. Coincidently, a very very successful one.
11. All white men put lots of soya sauce when they are having chinese food. (maybe only those he knows. I have never seen them doing it.)
12. dessert is more important that the next seminar course. and he refuse to move until he gets his dessert.

By which time, I decided that I shall skip dessert. Save me the calories and the torture of having to listen to his life story. Like... Wha the f***?

Friday, June 24, 2005

Wha? Wha?

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